Dear Pool Moms and Dads,

How are you? Say, you're looking fab in your swimsuit and cover-up! I know you were at the pool so that your kids could enjoy it on such a hot day which is a super good idea!! I had the very same plan! And here's another suggestion --- watch and/or (and I know this is a shocking thought) -- play with your kid at the pool! I like kids, I really do . . . or I wouldn't have had 3 myself. But, I really don't want to watch and play with your kid. I have my own little darling to keep an eye on, and I want to play with her. Oh sure, I'll play a little and encourage your child who keeps telling me to "watch this" and "throw that to me", but wouldn't YOU rather be the one having fun at the pool with YOUR kid!

And hey, you parents [Moms] standing there in the big pool, is a little splashing going to make you disappear or wreck your "do??" I can so relate as I have about the worst hair imaginable. If it gets wet -- watch out -- it's scary!! So, guess what -- I wear a hat at the pool and hide it (yes, I am brilliant, aren't I!). I am sorry that Maddy splashed you a little bit when she was practicing her swimming!! But excuse me, if you don't expect to get a little wet, get out of the pool. And please don't give my sweet girl a dirty look for splashing a teensy bit of water. She's doing what you're supposed to do in a swimming pool . . . swimming!!! Listen, when I got wacked on the side of the head with a pool diving stick thingy that was flying a bit erratically, did I get all pissy with the little girl that did it???? No, I did not. It didn't hurt, it just surprised me and she didn't mean to hit me with it (at least I don't think she did). Her Mom apologized up and down and I told her to forget about it, it was no big deal at all. So, the lesson to be learned today is -- have fun at the pool, expect to get wet and wear a hat if needed!! That's all now, let's go enjoy some lovely pool time, shall we!!